Even though Isaac was raised in a Christian home, he opened the door to sin at a very young age. By 14, as a freshman in high school, he was already traveling down a destructive road of drug addiction, pornography, stealing, and dangerous thoughts of suicide. As Isaac’s depression worsened, he took even greater risks, until one weekend he had an encounter with God. Since then the depression has vanished, and Isaac’s life has undergone an amazing change.
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Isaac’s Amazing Change
I was raised, and am still being raised, in a Christian home with good parents. We go to a good church. My parents taught me right from wrong as a little kid, and they taught me about God and Jesus. In essence, I believed them. So everything in life was going well until I was about 12. Then, during a period of 3 years, Satan got quite close to claiming my soul.At age 12, my friend introduced me to pornography. And I have to say, I enjoyed it. For the first time, my image of right and wrong was shattered, as Satan got that foothold he needed to pervert my life with sin. It was a slow-working process. I went on like this for about a year. Then it got worse.
At 13 I started to get depressed. It happened for normal, young-guy reasons … girl trouble. And honestly, looking back, it was nothing to even get close to depressed over. I liked a girl, but she didn’t like me back. Nonetheless, I got depressed.Then started that always-fun-for-parents rebellious phase of my life. I’d yell at them and get ticked-off at everything. I’d flip them off behind their backs. I had started cussing pretty bad about this time too. Because of their reactions, I honestly thought they hated me. I thought that nobody loved me, and that I was hated by everyone except my friends.
I decided I had to do something, so I started skateboarding in January of 2006. It was supposed to be an outlet for my depression, and it worked at the time. When I was skating, I’d forget about my troubles entirely. But not even skating would work completely, just as the enemy had planned it.
Turning Away from God
By the time I was 14, during the summer before my freshman year of high school, I had pretty much denounced Christianity. I went so far as to flip God off at times. I remember one time I had just gotten up off the bathroom floor from crying my eyes out, because I was so depressed, and I flipped him off saying, “F*** you, God!”So, obviously I was in pretty bad shape. But, instead of turning to God, who I thought hated me, I started looking into drugs. I didn’t get my hands on any for a while, but I started trying to get one substance in particular. Over the summer, I’d searched to get it, but couldn’t get any. After that summer, I “came back” to God, but still hanging onto terrible liberal philosophies to simply justify my sin. My reason for coming back was honestly to get a girl to like me. Then came the worst few months of my life.
Experimenting with Drugs
I was a freshman. It was November 2006. I was still 14, and I even more depressed than ever. One night when my parents were away, I started looking up information about the drugs I found in the medicine cabinet. Soon I found something that would make my drug-dreams come true. It was an over the counter medicine, but I won’t give the name, to keep others from temptation. It was a hallucinogen and a deliriant.I started taking the drug occasionally, until my parents bought a full bottle of pills. I was stoked. And because they bought them for me, since I was having a problem that the medicine was meant to treat, I took them a lot, in larger doses than was recommended. I loved getting high, because when I was high, I had no depression. The only problem was, when I would come back down, I was much more depressed than before.
Then I got the wild idea to steal some. So I went to the store one day, walked to the pharmacy and, not going into detail, stole it. I got away with it very easily. Now I had a full bottle of the stuff that nobody knew about but me. Big mistake for me.After that, having not succeeded in hallucinating yet, I decided one Sunday after church that I would pop pills until I hallucinated. I was home alone because my parents had a wake to attend. After dinner, I popped pills, 4 every 15 minutes, for 2 hours and 15 minutes. That’s 36 pills! And I had the weirdest trip.
Even though I had been scared to death, Satan convinced me that this was fun and just what I needed. So, I started getting high all the time. I rarely took big doses, just moderate ones.
Then I met another stoner at my church youth group, and we started talking some. I got bored with just the drug I was taking, and started also taking the drug I had searched for almost 6 months earlier. I ended up doing it 3 times.
I started smoking every now and then, cigarettes that I stole from my mom. Then, getting desperate, I stole a prescription drug from my aunt who had had surgery a few years back.
Thoughts of Suicide
I used the drug without feeling a bit of guilt. Yet every Sunday, when the pastor gave the alter call, I’d feel God pulling at my heart. I didn’t heed the call, but instead, I ran. Soon enough, thoughts of suicide came alongside the depression.
Then, in March 2007, came the weekend that would change my life forever.
It is called by my youth group, “Winterfest Weekend.” We all pack up early Friday morning and head down to Winterfest in Knoxville, TN. So, my friend and I went, mainly to get away from our parents and get out of a day at school. Little did I know how my life would be changed that weekend.
The first night, I played “Christian.” To quote from a Jentzen Franklin message called, “Keep Your Underwear On,” I looked like a Christian on the outside, but on the inside, I didn’t have my underwear on. I was faking it. I truly was worshiping God, but I had no intention of letting go of my sinful lifestyle. My friend and I were planning to go the next day and rob the Knoxville Mall of our preferred drug and get high in the service.
Thank Jesus, we had chaperones at the mall, so we didn’t do it. (Although we did buy itching powder at Spensor’s and put it on people in our youth group. But, that’s beside the point.)
Crying Out to God
That night we went to the service. I listened, worshiped God and all, just like the night before. Tommy Bates was preaching on the Holy Spirit, and how Satan wants to destroy us. I didn’t agree with him at the time on some points, like that drugs are sinful, but still God tugged at my heart, as usual.
At the end of the message, when he called for anyone who had not been filled with the Holy Spirit to come, three others went: my friend, and two other guys from our youth group. Because I wasn’t alone, I went down and called out to God. I honestly don’t know where the words I cried came from, because I surely wasn’t thinking them. I guess it was from my spirit.
To summarize, I cried, “God, I’m tired of giving you only part of me. Lord, take all of me and fill me with your Holy Spirit!”
So, I kept praying like this for about 10 minutes. Then a girl, who looked to be about 12 years old, with bloodshot eyes from crying, came up to me and said, “The Lord said to tell you, he’s going to fill you with the Holy Spirit tonight.” That touched me. There was no way she could have heard me. The music was so loud I couldn’t even hear me. I knew her words were from the Lord. I knew he must have heard my plea for salvation, and that he would do as he said. So she prayed for me.
Within about 5 seconds, I couldn’t stop shaking and was having trouble standing. In that instant, my drug addiction, my depression and suicidal thoughts, my porn addiction, all of it had vanished! I was free!
I lay on the floor for about 20 minutes praising the King of Kings! This was even after Tommy dismissed the service. Eventually some of the adults came and helped me up. I was walking like I was drunk. It was the best “high” I’d ever had, and it wasn’t drug induced! I found out when I got back to the hotel that my friend had come to Jesus and been filled as well, along with the other two guys.
Since then my life has changed completely. God has done some amazing things. He still has a lot of work to do in me. I’m anything but perfect, but he has come into my life, taken away my sin, and now he is the center of my life.
To anyone out there hurting like I was, I’ll tell you, Jesus is the answer. Satan may blind you, as he did me. But realize that life isn’t about what you know, but about faith that God knowswhat he is doing.
God has helped me through the hardest year in my life, without as much as a slight thought of suicide. I had surgery and lost my grandma, all in a months time. But the Lord got me through it, and not only that, with joy!
Thanks for reading this. I hope it has blessed you.
From Isaac Snuffer, Follower of Christ!