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Posts tagged ‘Kansas City Star’

Mike Bickle Reveals Prayer Strategies at IHOPKC’s OneThing Conference.


 

crowd shot of One Thing conference
Over 30,000 people from 100 countries met in Kansas City for the International House of Prayer Conference. (K.M. Photography)

Over 30,000 people from 100 countries gathered in Kansas City for the One Thing Conference hosted by the International House of Prayer (IHOP) in late December. The conference was also the launch of the first annual summit of the major leaders in the missions, prayer and Bible translation movements and a partnership with the Seed Company of Wycliff Bible Translators. “We want to see the Gospel preached and 24/7 worship and prayer in every tribe and tongue,” Mike Bickle, founder of the International House of Prayer said in the opening session.

Bickle added, “We’re believing for 10,000 prayer chains or prayer ministries across the earth. We’re hosting the first meeting bringing together the movements in church planting, missions, prayer and Bible translation. There’s one movement in God’s heart and some people think a call to prayer and fasting is a call to isolation and disengage. The missions movement needs the prayer movement and the local church needs to be filled with the glory of God.”

Over 500 leaders from around the world met for the first OneThing Leadership Summit. “We sent letters to 200 leaders inviting them to this summit six weeks ago,” says Daniel Lim, CEO of the International House of Prayer. “Over 80 percent of the leaders we invited said ‘yes.’ This is such a unique meeting because we have a common urgency that we need to pray.”

Mark Anderson, president of Youth With a Mission called the summit historic. “We are in a time right now where we are launching a new expression of missions and prayer.” Johannes Hartl, a House of Prayer leader in Europe and theologian, is hosting a conference in Europe on Friday that will attract up to 4,000 people. Hartl founded 50 Houses of Prayer in Europe. “Today’s meeting was mind-blowing and overwhelming,” he said. “I saw great unity and humility with all of the leaders. I’m also surprised at how far the prayer movement has come.” The IHOP conference in Europe will be broadcast on BibleTV.

IHOP leaders unveiled the results of a survey at the summit that revealed houses of prayer are in 18 nations on 6 continents. The main proponents of prayer are millenials with over 60 percent of the participants under the age of 35. Over 30 percent of the houses of prayers have 40 hours a week of corporate prayer.

Leaders at the summit also pledged to pray for over 300 languages that still need to be translated by Wycliff’s Seed Company. “Something historic that has never happened before is happening before our very eyes with the prayer movement joining hands with the Bible translation movement,” says Roy Peterson, CEO of The Seed Company.

“There are over 6,000 Wycliff Bible translators who go to places no one wants to, they are hated by locals and unsung heroes of the Body of Christ,” says Bickle. “They work 8 to 10 hours a day writing and translating the Bible.” Brian Kim, director of the Luke 18 project at IHOP added that 4 billion people had no Bible. “This is the ultimate injustice.”

Bickle sees the IHOP movement as a catalyst for missions, evangelism and Bible translation. “We’re just hosting the dialogue and providing the platform for new relationships, new ideas and new plans every year in Kansas City,” he said. “The prayer movement is the banner for all of these over movements.”

The IHOP movement has dramatically expanded in a city famous for its Prayer Mountain – Seoul, Korea. “We’ve been in Seoul for four years,” says Hojong Boaz Pank, leader of the House of Prayer in Korea. “We over 100 churches involved with 112 full-time and part-time staff. I came here in 2011 with my whole family – including my mother-in-law – from Seoul to receive training. Today’s meeting (with summit leaders) was very strategic and I’m expecting some great things to come.”

Source: CHARISMA NEWS.

Leilani Haywood is the editor of Spirit Led Woman and frequent contributor to Charisma. Leilani is a Kansas City, Mo.-based award-winning writer and columnist. She has been published in the Kansas City Star, Metro Voice and other publications. Follow her on Twitter @leilanihaywood.

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Break the Drought Over Your Life.


drought
(iStockphoto.com)
One thing God loves to do is show off. I know this is hard to fathom, but God loves to display His power andglory to make a point that you’ll never forget. In 1 Kings 18, God marks the memory of His people by consuming a sacrifice by fire.
Some of you may know the story of how Elijah challenged 400 prophets of Baal. This was a showdown between Baal and the God of Elijah during a severe drought in the land. Elijah had declared a drought over the land, and it was so bad that people were eating their children to live.
During this time, water was as precious as gold. Elijah prepared his sacrifice and asked for 12 large jars of water to be poured out on the altar. You have to wonder where Elijah stored 12 large jars of water when everyone else had no water. He was pouring out the most precious commodity of that time on God.
Elijah poured out what was most valuable on the altar. God responded immediately by consuming the water and the sacrifice by fire: “Then the fire of the Lord fell and burned up the sacrifice, the wood, the stones and the soil, and also licked up the water in the trench. When all the people saw this, they fell prostrate and cried, ‘The Lord—he is God! The Lord—he is God!’” (vv. 38-39, NIV).
God Responds
The response didn’t stop with the sacrifice: “And Elijah said to Ahab, ‘Go, eat and drink, for there is the sound of a heavy rain.” (v. 41). The sacrifice broke the drought over the land.
If you’re struggling with a drought in your life—it could be a famine of the Word of God or a lack of finances, or maybe a famine for the presence of God—take note of Elijah’s action. Elijah took what was most valuable in his day and poured it out on God.
God proved Himself faithful by pouring rain on the land. When you show your utter dependence on Him by giving Him what’s most valuable to you—your time or your money—God will respond.
We’ve sowed numerous times into the work of God when we didn’t have it. We’ve seen God prove Himself over and over again with an unexpected $15,000 or $60,000 to $70,000 in scholarships and grants that our son didn’t even apply for or in new clients that came to me without my having to market myself.
We had a famine of God’s presence where we were living and decided to move to Kansas City. Before we moved, my husband, Jerome, wanted me to move ahead of the family. We were moving to help build World Revival Church.
Jerome opted to stay in Columbia, Mo., to get the house ready to sell. “It will be easier for you to find a job,” he said.
He was right, because I was offered several positions. Of course, that meant I had to leave my 1-year-old and 4-year-old sons. I remember praying and crying out to God about the anguish of leaving them.
Then a Scripture came to my mind: “’Truly I tell you,’ Jesus said to them, ‘no one who has left home or wife or brothers or sisters or parents or children for the sake of the kingdom of God will fail to receive many times as much in this age, and in the age to come eternal life’” (Luke 18:29-30).
I remember weeping as I read that Scripture over and over again. OK, it wasn’t like I was one of those missionaries I’ve read about who left their kids in another country so they could preach the gospel in a dangerous area. I was just moving 1 1/2 hours from my kids and husband.
But I remember Jerome and I praying about this and laying it before God. I believed that for that season of sacrifice, my children would reap. I prayed they wouldn’t have to see a therapist when they turned 30 about that season when I left. I felt like a bad mom, but I got to see them Friday through Sunday.
Now we’ve lived in Kansas City for 14 years, and we’ve seen tremendous blessings. I poured out being with my babies for a few months for the sake of the kingdom. And God has poured the blessing of being a family that serves God together back on us. That temporary sacrifice broke the famine of His presence in our family.
My sons don’t even remember my being gone for those three months when I lived in Kansas City on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday and then drove back to Columbia to be with them on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. (Please know that I don’t recommend leaving your children to follow God. My husband prayed and sought counsel for this decision.)
I proved God to my own hurt, and He proved Himself over and over and over again. God will not be outdone in sacrifice. Prove Him by pouring out on Him, and He will respond to you.
Leilani Haywood is the editor of SpiritLed Woman and a frequent contributor to Charisma. She is an award-winning writer who has been published in The Kansas City Star, Focus on the Family, Metrovoice Newspaper and many other publications

Faith, Hope and Love: Three Gifts That Keep Giving.


girl looking in a big wrapped present
Sometimes the gifts that continue to impact another person’s life don’t come in a box. (© Sonifo iStockPhoto.com)

“Let’s wrap up boxes and books and put them under the tree,” my mom said one night. I was six-years-old and didn’t think anything was odd about wrapping up books and empty boxes. I was excited about the idea of spending time with mom who was busy working from early in the morning as a farm laborer. Most of the time she was asleep when I got home from school.

My little brother and sister were excited about the brightly wrapped presents with shiny bows under the sparkling tinsel tree. I realized that the reason we wrapped those gifts is because she had no money to buy presents. I kept that secret until mom told us we would open our gifts after we came back from grandma and grandpa’s house.

Thinking back on that Christmas, she was trying to feed three kids on a farm laborer’s wage. I remember we had to stand in line with food stamps to buy groceries, which was really embarrassing. We had no presents that year from mom but in later years I gained three gifts that have proven priceless over and over again.

“Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love.” 1 Corinthians 13:13

The gift of faith. My grandpa picked us up that day. On the way to his house, a police car pulled up behind him with flashing lights. He didn’t understand why he was getting pulled over since he always drove under the speed limit. The policeman asked him how many children were in the car. He went back to his car and returned with an arm full of presents.

We weren’t Christians but I believed that my mom had faith that something good was going to happen that day despite the despair of trying to feed her children on farm laborer’s wages and the shame of receiving welfare checks and food stamps. My mom became a Christian many years later but she always had this incredible optimism and faith in her.

The unexpected presents from an unexpected source are like the gifts that God brings everyday. We take these gifts for granted — the gift of a relationship, the gift of a job in a bad economy or the gift of a child’s love. “Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.” Hebrews 11:1 We can carry God’s faith into our holiday gatherings.

My mom taught me to live by faith and that lesson brought me unexpected scholarships that I didn’t apply for to get into college.

The gift of hope. Fast forward many years and I’m college student paying my own way in Hawaii. I have no money to buy presents and my family lives in California. I pray and ask God for creative ideas for presents for my friends and family. I pray for each person that I want to give a gift to and suddenly I get an idea for writing a story about how that person reminds me of a character in the Bible.

Each person receives a story with pictures in a little booklet. Every person I gave that booklet to say that was the best gift they had ever received. Through those stories, I gave them the gift of hope. I gave the gift that they are becoming someone who Jesus intended to them to be. I stirred up the flame of destiny in them through the words on that page. The cost for that present was my time seeking the Lord on their behalf. We can give the gift of hope in this holiday season by being a vessel for Him to speak His words of life and hope to others.

The gift of love. My friend Faith calls me right before Christmas in 1998. I’m fighting depression after my mom died. I’m hopeless and this dark cloud sits over me. I have a wonderful Christian husband, two beautiful little boys, a gorgeous home, and great job but can’t enjoy any of it because of the depression. Faith says she wants to fly me from Columbia, MO. to West Palm Beach to go with her to some revival services.

Right after New Year‘s, I fly to West Palm Beach. Faith takes me to revival services at her church and I receive an incredible touch from God. That time prepares me for my visit to the Smithton Outpouring in February where I’m set free from depression. Hope and faith come back with the love of my friend. Faith gave me the gift of love that set me in the right direction at that time.

Demonstrate God’s love during this holiday season. Love is the engine of faith and hope in action carrying His presence into the room. Call that person who needs His love. Or take them to lunch or dinner. Above all, take action. Don’t let another Christmas pass by without reaching out to that person who has been on your heart.

“Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Give the gifts that keep giving after Christmas – the gift of faith, hope and love.

Source: CHARISMA MAGAZINE/ SPIRITLED WOMAN.

LEILANI HAYWOOD

Leilani Haywood is the editor of SpiritLed Woman and a frequent contributor to Charisma. She is an award-winning writer who has been published in The Kansas City Star, Focus on the Family, Metrovoice Newspaper and many other publications.

Joel Osteen, Rick Warren Among Facebook Money Scammer Targets.


Joel Osteen
Joel Osteen
As if they haven’t caused enough pain and chaos, Internet scam artists have come up with a new sect of the public on which to prey these days: pastors and evangelists.

Churchleaders.com recently reported that high-profile Christian leaders like Joel Osteen, Rick Warren, Perry Noble, Craig Groeschel and Miles McPherson have warned their supporters about unauthorized Facebook pages that have been identified with their ministries. Scammers were reportedly using the fake accounts to solicit donations.

Other evangelists that have been targeted include John Hagee, Benny Hinn, Jamal Bryant and LifeWay Research President Ed Stetzer.

The Kansas City Star reported that local pastor Rev. Adam Hamilton, of the 18,000-member United Methodist Church of the Resurrection of Leawood, Kan., was a victim of a scammer who attempted to “con people into supporting phony church mission projects.”

Hamilton told the Star he is angry and continues to warn his congregation about the scams.

“Somebody is using my pictures and my name in order to take advantage of other people and to hurt them,” Hamilton said. “That makes me mad. It sounds like another Nigerian scam.”

Hagee posted a video on YouTube warning his followers about the fake Facebook pages.

The Star also reported that a fake appeal on a Facebook page of Hawaiian pastor Wayne Cordeiro “persuaded at least one member of his congregation to wire $1,000 to the scammer, according to Facecrooks.com, which tracks fraud on the Internet.”

Osteen’s fake Facebook message asked for money for an orphanage. The Better Business Bureau’s website reported that the language used to convey the message is suspicious because it is in broken English. Osteen does not speak in broken English.

Before making a donation of any kind to any organization, the Better Business Bureau suggests that you check with their website about the organization, or you can check out CharityNavigator.org.

Source: CHARISMA NEWS.

SHAWN A. AKERS

5 Signs That He Is ‘The One’.


Jerome & Leilani Haywood
Jerome & Leilani Haywood

Since I wrote “Five Signs That He Is Not “The One”, which was shared over 4,000 times, I decided to write a counterpoint article. These five signs were confirmed when my husband, Jerome, asked me to marry him.

#1: He has a vibrant relationship with God that shows in his involvement with the church.

Jerome was a former campus evangelist. The first time we met was in 1985, when we were on a missions trip to Boston. I was there from Hawaii, and he was from Missouri. When I met him, it was like meeting the postman. He made no impression on me, but in a group picture that we took together, he was standing right behind me.

We kept running into each other throughout the years because we had a lot of mutual friends who were active in ministry. I was attending the University of Hawaii at the time and was very active in my church. He was part of a team that was starting a church at the University of Missouri in Columbia, Mo.

Several years later, I moved to Gainesville, Fla., to work with the ministry’s magazine. I ran into Jerome again when he was visiting the ministry’s headquarters to attend a leadership training seminar. I thought he was really funny, but I didn’t imagine that years later I would be walking down the aisle with him.

The next time I ran into Jerome was at a pastor’s conference in Indianapolis. His pastors knew me and were very supportive of Jerome and me grabbing lunch. I wanted to go to lunch with Jerome to find out what was going on with some of our mutual friends.

That lunch turned into a three-hour conversation where I felt like I had just met my best friend. I was amazed at how much we had in common. For one moment, it seemed like we had met on the interstate of life but had driven along the frontage road in the same direction for years. We had the same vision and same ministry experiences. That was a sign that maybe Jerome was more than just another buddy but a friend for life.

#2: Your leaders or pastors think marrying him is a good idea.

Several months after that conference, Jerome asked me to marry him. It was really fast, but we had known each other for seven years. Still, I asked several leaders who knew us both for their opinion. They spoke highly of Jerome’s integrity, faithfulness, commitment and sacrifice.

Jerome had a reputation after serving in ministry for many years and had led half of the guys in his church to the Lord. He had discipled them and fathered them in the faith. He was not a novice in the faith. This was another sign that God may have be leading me to marry Jerome.

My church recommends that singles interested in a new believer give them a year. I like this test because it will show whether the new believer is serious about their faith or whether God is just a passing fad for them.

#3: Your parents like him.

The first time I met my future father-in-law, Erdis, in Natchez, Miss., he was skinning a squirrel. I could barely understand his heavy Southern accent, but he approved Jerome’s choice. When Jerome met my mother, Aloha, and my stepfather, Celes, in Stockton, Calif., they instantly liked him.

Jerome was funny and relatable, and he made them feel like his best friend. He still has that incredible gift that won my heart. My parents’ approval was a sign that he was the one.

#4: He has a job.

Jerome was a salesman in electronics at Sears. His pay was pure commission, and he did very well in this position, which was a sign to me that he was a hard worker. When you work in a commission-only position, if you don’t work, you don’t eat.

I’ve seen women turn away guys who had jobs but the job wasn’t up to their standard. The girl wanted a guy who was earning a manager’s salary, but he was working at a convenience store. Even though the guy loves God and is very involved in the church, I’ve seen girls who have snubbed them for someone outside the church who earns more money and looks more attractive.

The guy who doesn’t love God but has a great job and looks more attractive may pull you away from the faith. Actually, I’ll bet $20 that you will not be in church after a month of dating this guy. I’ve seen this pattern play out over and over again, and it is heartbreaking.

I believe that if the guy is working hard at his current job, God will promote him. Girls, you just need to be patient and let God make him into who he is called to be. If the guy is faithful, hard-working and a good listener who loves God, he will advance in life. Don’t pass up a guy because he may be earning less than you do at the moment. Give him some years of working hard and serving God, and faithfulness will pay off.

#5: He doesn’t pressure you into premarital sex.

Jerome quit dating at 21 and was celibate for 13 years until we got married. I don’t know very many guys who could claim this record. If the guy speaks in tongues, reads his Bible everyday and memorizes Scripture yet pressures you into sleeping with him, saying that you can repent or God will give you grace, run!

Guys who can exercise self-control when they’re single will be faithful during marriage. I know that virginity or being celibate as a single is not a popular topic in church sermons. But God has a lot to say about sexual immorality: “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous” (Heb. 13:4, ESV).

With these five signs confirmed, you should have a good sense of whether the guy who just asked you to marry him is really “the one.” If one of these signs is red, then I recommend waiting until that sign turns green.

What other signs do you think make the guy a bad candidate for marriage? Tell us on Facebook.


Leilani Haywood is a Kansas City, Mo.-based award-winning writer and columnist. Her work has been published in the Kansas City StarMetro Voice and other publications. When she’s not updating her status on Facebook or Twitter, she’s working on her book. Follow her on Twitter @leilanihaywood.

How to Get Your Kids to Talk About God During Dinner.


Tricia Goyer
Tricia Goyer

Dinnertime conversations about God are normal for Tricia Goyer and her five children. An accomplished author of 30 books, Goyer shared with SpiritLed Woman about the importance of talking about God at mealtimes. Goyer is hosting a Facebook chat on May 1 and a giveaway for her new family devotional,Whit’s End Mealtime Devotions. The devotional, published by Tyndale House, is being released by Focus on the Family‘s popular radio show Adventures in Odyssey. The show has over 2 million listeners in the U.S. and is broadcast in over 40 countries.

Q: Do you have mealtime devotionals with your kids?

TG: For John and I, dinnertime is more than just feeding our bodies. We also see it as a time to feed our kids’ souls. We use mealtime to talk about God, to share Scripture, and to use books like Whit’s End Mealtime Devotions. We don’t have a set schedule, and each night is different. I think being prepared to do something is key.

Q: How do you manage to have mealtime devotionals with 6 kids?

TG: Our six children range in age from 2 to 23. Our oldest son is married with a baby. Our second and third oldest are university students who live at home, and our three youngest joined our family through adoption. They are ages 5, 3 and 2! When everyone is there, we have a busy table, but even at a young age our children join us in prayer and talking about God’s Word. This type of family worship is as regular to them as asking for “More peas, please!”

Q: How do you have a mealtime devotional in a busy household?

TG: The hardest part of mealtime is getting the meal on the table. Right before dinnertime is a busy time for our large family. Our kids are coming and going, and the little ones like playing outside and are in and out, in and out. Yet we make it a priority to sit together. We always wait for Dad to get home from work. We make sure the television is off, and we all gather around. Once we are settled, you can almost see everyone releasing a big breath—finally, peace and quiet and time to connect with each other and God!

Q: How often do you have a mealtime devotional with your kids?

TG: We talk about God every night. We have a more “formal” devotional time a few times a week. We tailor our devotional books or Scripture verses we’re reading at the younger kids’ level. Just talking about where all the food on the table comes from and how God made it all is an example of a great mealtime conversation.

Q: What results have you seen with mealtime devotionals?

TG: Our family members have a close relationship. We talk to each other about our lives, experiences, joys and struggles. Because of our openness, our kids know they can talk to us about anything or ask any question.

Just last week, our 20-year-old asked her dad how he shares his personal testimony since he’s walked with God since he was a young child. That one question became the topic of the night, and we talked about how each of us sin and need God’s grace. Sometimes the older ones will be talking about their classes at the secular university and how they relate to God, and sometimes the younger ones are talking about the worms they found and how God takes care of them.

Conversations like that are typical, and even the younger kids jump in with their simple thoughts about doing bad and asking forgiveness when they hear us adults talking about it.

Tricia Goyer is hosting a 12-day “Diverting Dinnertime” giveaway that ends April 30th. Visit herFacebook page for a new giveaway every day. On May 1, she is hosting a Facebook party, where you can ask your own questions about having a mealtime devotion. Your question will qualify you to win some prizes, including copies of Whit’s End Mealtime Devotions.

Source: CHARISMA MAGAZINE/ SPIRITLED WOMAN.

LEILANI HAYWOOD


Leilani Haywood is a Kansas City, Mo.-based award-winning writer and columnist. Her work has been published in the Kansas City StarMetro Voice and other publications. When she’s not updating her status on Facebook or Twitter, she’s working on her book. Follow her on Twitter @leilanihaywood.

5 Signs He Is Not ‘The One’.


date
(© Milanlj | Dreamstime Stock Photos & Stock Free Images (http://www.stockfreeimages.com))

With the divorce rate in the church matching the world’s, I thought I would offer this fresh reminder to single women considering serious relationships. I’ve seen a lot of heartache from women who didn’t listen to leaders who advised them not to marry. From the pattern of divorces, these are the five red flags I’ve seen women ignore when marrying the wrong guy.

#1: He has no interest in God.

I’ve been amazed at how many women ignore this basic warning sign. But I think this sign is ignored because they are desperate for male attention or looking for a father they never had. Don’t get me wrong—he may seem like he is interested in God for a season … until he gets you down the aisle. Then prepare for Sunday-morning battles when he would rather go to a sports activity than go to church.

Marriage is not an opportunity to evangelize, nor is it an outreach activity. God takes marriage so seriously that He states that you can’t be unequally yoked: “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” (2 Cor. 6:14 NIV)

Besides making the decision to follow Christ, getting married is the most important decision you’ll ever make in your life.

#2: Your leaders or pastors think marrying him is a bad idea.

I’ve seen marriages take place despite warnings from leaders. In most cases, the marriages ended in divorce or they are hanging by a thread. When my husband, Jerome, asked me to marry him, I asked several leaders for their advice. I also asked about his character. Every leader gave my future fiancé a rave review and spoke highly of his integrity, faithfulness and loyalty. Their review was a sign that he was “the one” for me.

#3: Your parents don’t like him.

My mom use to tell me how much her parents hated my dad. Well, he was a 29-year-old man who enticed a 15-year-old girl into marrying him against her parents’ wishes! Of course they were going to hate his guts. She wished many years later she would have listened to her parents.

My grandparents were not Christians, but I believe God gives parents a radar for men who don’t have the best motives for their daughters. When my mom met Jerome, she instantly liked him. Jerome won my parents’ hearts and approval for marrying me. That was the second sign that Jerome was “the one” for me.

#4: He doesn’t have a job or can’t hold one down.

I had a guy pay for my dinner with food stamps. Although he was a Christian, this was a sign from God he was not a candidate for a serious relationship. If you have to pay your own way in the relationship or help him out financially because he can’t hold down a job, he is not a candidate for marriage. He may speak in tongues and read the Bible, but if he can’t hold down a job, this is a red flag about his character.

One of my friends met a guy in the unemployment office. I told her I didn’t think the unemployment office was the best place to meet a guy. She dated him but ended the relationship because he wasn’t employed.

The Bible says if you don’t work, you don’t eat. Having a work ethic is a must for someone you’re considering for marriage: “For even when we were with you, we gave you this rule: ‘The one who is unwilling to work shall not eat.'” (2 Thess. 3:10)

#5: He has an addiction.

A friend of mine married someone who struggled with online pornography. She didn’t know he struggled with this until they were years into their marriage with several children. He wouldn’t go for counseling, and they eventually divorced.

A man who is addicted to pornography, drugs or liquor is not a candidate for marriage. He may tell you he plans to get counseling or wants God to set him free—because that’s what you want to hear. But until he is free from that addiction, he is not “the one.”

I plead with you to not compromise on these standards. I’ve seen so much heartache in families with women marrying against the counsel of wise leaders or marrying someone with an addiction. Listen to your leaders and parents. And above all, don’t pay his way. He is not “the one.”

LEILANI HAYWOOD


Leilani Haywood is a Kansas City, Mo.-based award-winning writer and columnist. Her work has been published in the Kansas City StarMetro Voice and other publications. When she’s not updating her status on Facebook or Twitter, she’s driving her three kids to school or their next rehearsal. Follow her on Twitter @leilanihaywood.

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