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Posts tagged ‘Pornography’

Thousands Pray Against Pornography Following Industry Shutdown.


praying hands bound
Thousands will join together Tuesday for the first of what is planned to be an annual National Day of Prayer to strengthen the fight against pornography. (Travis Silva/creationswap.com)

Tuesday is the first of what is planned to be an annual National Day of Prayer to strengthen the fight against pornography. More than 40 groups and thousands of supporters will join together. Some of the allied groups participating in this effort include Alliance Defending Freedom, the American Family Association, Family Research Council, Movieguide and Concerned Women for America.

“Those in the war on pornography and those suffering the harms of pornography need almighty God’s mercy and support, and thus we set aside an entire day of prayer for victory,” says Patrick A. Trueman, president of Morality in Media.

The prayer day comes on the heels of the porn industry shutdown Friday—the third of the year—after a performer tested positive for HIV. Each time, medical harms to the actors are briefly attended to and production restarts.

“This is a tragedy that repeats itself every few months, and nothing is done besides a brief halt in porn production,” Trueman says. “After three strikes, it is time to do more than just shut down the industry for a few days. From addiction to abuse to the exploitation [of] women and children, people around the world are constantly affected by the porn industry.”

Pornography is inherently dehumanizing and sexually exploitative. Not only does porn lead to addiction and the breakdown of families, but it is also closely tied to sex trafficking, child abuse and violence against women.

Harms from pornography include increased demand for sexual trafficking, increased violence against women, widespread addiction, sexual exploitation of children and a host of other debilitating problems.

Suggested prayer requests and the complete list of supporting groups can be found atpornharms.com/prayer. People of all religious backgrounds are invited to participate.

Source: CHARISMA NEWS.

Should a Wife Keep Her Husband’s Sexual Sin a Secret?.


What should a bewildered wife do if she catches her husband viewing pornography?
What should a bewildered wife do if she catches her husband viewing pornography? (Suus Wansink)

Consider this predicament. Your boss, the company CEO, has given you a high-level project. After a few months on the job you discover that your new responsibilities involve falsifying records.

Not only that, but it appears your boss has been trying to cover up questionable accounting practices. When you confront the CEO, he makes it clear that your career will be over if you share his secret. He makes a strong argument that you have much more to lose than gain by going public. Then he demands your silence, asserting his authority as your supervisor to ensure you will comply.

Out of respect for his position of authority do you keep his secret? Even if means you are putting yourself at risk, now that you are knowledgeable of a crime but choosing not to report.

Now read this scenario. Mary’s husband Jim hasn’t been himself for months—moody, short-tempered, abrupt. One night, Mary wakes up and Jim is not there. When she walks downstairs, the reflection of the computer screen in the dining room mirror tells the story. Jim says he is sorry and it won’t happen again. But the computer history tells a different story—he is binging on porn and it’s only getting worse. When Mary suggests counseling, Jim refuses. Asserting his position as leader of the home, Jim also forbids her from telling anyone. Ever. Period.

Out of respect for his position of authority, should Mary keep his secret? Even if it means postponing her own healing and subjecting her family to the devastating effects of her husband’s escalating sexual sin?

Why is it that the corporate whistle-blower is applauded for standing up for what is right, but the wife who wants to sound the alarm is often silenced by the very community that should be offering her the most support. Unfortunately, the not-so-subtle message being communicated by some in the church to these hurting women is honor your husband by keeping silent, even at the expense of your own healing.

Who is communicating this destructive message? It’s the elder who tells a wife that she is over reacting. It’s the Sunday School teacher who whispers that maybe she should first try heating things up in the bedroom. It is the pastor who suggests the wife spend some more time praying for her husband to come around before meeting with a counselor. It’s anyone who even thinks, “That is just how God wired men.”

I’m not advocating a wife take to Facebook to share her pain or make a phone call to activate the prayer chain. There is no healing to be found there.  But she should be free to get the help she needs in the light of this devastating revelation and it’s time the church came alongside her with their full support.

Yes , she should be cautious who she shares with and, certainly, it would be considerate of her to share  her intentions with her husband to get outside help.  But if a husband attempts to use his authority as the spiritual head of the household to discourage his wife from getting help, then someone needs to call that out for what it is—spiritual manipulation, misuse of authority and unloving, self-centered sin.

There is nothing that strikes at our own core more deeply than our spouse’s sexual sin. Marriage, by its very nature—the becoming of one flesh—means the husband’s struggle is now the wife’s struggle. So if a wife wants to talk to someone about his struggle (now her struggle) she should be encouraged to do so, regardless of her husband’s discomfort.

A husband might wonder why his wife would even want to share her painful story with anyone anyway. It is something most husbands have tried so hard to hide. They don’t like to acknowledge its ugly existence, much less have conversations about it. Here is what husbands need to realize:

  • We don’t like talking about it, we need to talk about it.  When we get the thoughts out of our head and express them and hear feedback, it helps us grieve. It is like a valve releasing some of the pressure that has built up.
  • Talking about it helps us feel less isolated and alone.
  • Talking about it helps us organize our thoughts and emotions that feel out of control. Any sense of control is calming in the midst of this storm.

I believe there are thousands of wives sitting in our church pews each Sunday, suffering alone in silence. What can churches do to release wives from being their husband’s secret-keeper?

  • Become a congregation where people are real, suffering in this world is understood to be inevitable and the body is involved in helping broken-people heal. This example will give courage to couples that are afraid to share their brokenness.
  • Give wives a safe and confidential place to share.
  • Hold husbands accountable to their positions as spiritual leaders Sunday through Saturday—do this from the pulpit, on the golf course, one-on-one, and in small groups.
  • Don’t support a theology of secret keeping.

Think about it this: Who do we partner with when we help hide sin? In 2 Thessalonians 2:7 the Bible says the secret power of lawlessness is already at work and will remain at work until the man of lawlessness is completely removed. Church, we partner with our very Enemy when we encourage sin to remain hidden. To do so under the cloak of “respect for spiritual authority” is a joke. And the Enemy is laughing while our marriages are dying.

Leaders of the church, free these wives. Encourage them to get the help they need. If that means exposing their husband’s secret sin, against their husband’s will, then so be it. It is the most loving and respectful thing they can do on behalf of their marriage.

For the original article, visit pastors.com.

Source: CHARISMA MAGAZINE/ NEW MAN.

MARSHA FISHER

Marsha Fisher and her husband Jeff are the creators of Inside Out Ministries and Porn to Purity. They are using their marriage recovery story as a platform to shed light on the growing problem of pornography addiction within the church and the gospel-centered resources available for those who want to find freedom.

Report: NSA Spied on Porn Habits of Islamic Radicals.


The National Security Agency gathered evidence on the porn-watching habits of six Islamic radicals as part of an effort to discredit them, reports The Huffington Post,  citing documents provided by former NSA contractor Edward Snowden.

The document, dated Oct. 3, 2012, states that “Some of the vulnerabilities, if exposed, would likely call into question a radicalizer‘s devotion to the jihadist cause, leading to the degradation or loss of his authority,” according to the Post.

Among the vulnerabilities to be exploited are “viewing sexually explicit material online” and “using sexually explicit persuasive language when communicating with inexperienced young girls,” it said.

The Director of the NSA is reportedly listed as the “originator” of the document, which was sent to officials with the Departments of Justice and Commerce as well as the Drug Enforcement Administration.

None of the six individuals targeted by the NSA is accused of being involved in any terror plots, and the agency believes they all live outside the country, although it identifies one of them as a “U.S. person,” noted the Post.

Deputy Legal Director of the American Civil Liberties Union Jameel Jaffer told the publication that the revelations raise new concerns about the NSA’s abuse of  power.

“It’s important to remember that the NSA’s surveillance activities are anything but narrowly focused. The agency is collecting massive amounts of sensitive information about virtually everyone,” he said.

“Wherever you are, the NSA’s databases store information about your political views, your medical history, your intimate relationships and your activities online,” Jaffer added.

“Hmm, what could be dangerous about the world’s most powerful spy agency using pornography viewing habits to discredit political opponents?” tweeted Ben Wizner,  director of the ACLU Speech Privacy & Technology Project on Wednesday.

The latest news also comes as the European Union is reviewing a commercial data-sharing agreement with the U.S., known as Safe Harbor, in the wake of the Snowden revelation, reports USA Today.

Viviane Reding, the European Commissioner for Justice, Fundamental Rights and Citizenship, is reportedly threatening to freeze the pact, maintaining that U.S. surveillance activities will have to comply with EU law and that Europeans whose rights may have been violated will have to be allowed legal recourse in American courts.

Related Stories:

© 2013 Newsmax. All rights reserved.
By Lisa Barron

Should a Wife Keep Her Husband’s Sexual Sin a Secret?.


What should a bewildered wife do if she catches her husband viewing pornography?

What should a bewildered wife do if she catches her husband viewing pornography? (Suus Wansink)

Consider this predicament: Your boss, the company CEO, has given you a high-level project. After a few months on the job, you discover that your new responsibilities involve falsifying records.

Not only that, but it appears your boss has been trying to cover up questionable accounting practices. When you confront the CEO, he makes it clear that your career will be over if you share his secret. He makes a strong argument that you have much more to lose than gain by going public. Then he demands your silence, asserting his authority as your supervisor to ensure you will comply.

Out of respect for his position of authority, do you keep his secret? Even if means you are putting yourself at risk, now that you are knowledgeable of a crime but choosing not to report it?

Now read this scenario: Mary’s husband, Jim, hasn’t been himself for months—moody, short-tempered, abrupt. One night, Mary wakes up and Jim is not there. When she walks downstairs, the reflection of the computer screen in the dining room mirror tells the story.

Jim says he is sorry and it won’t happen again. But the computer history tells a different story—he is binging on porn, and it’s only getting worse. When Mary suggests counseling, Jim refuses. Asserting his position as leader of the home, Jim also forbids her from telling anyone. Ever. Period.

Out of respect for his position of authority, should Mary keep his secret? Even if it means postponing her own healing and subjecting her family to the devastating effects of her husband’s escalating sexual sin?

Why is it that the corporate whistle-blower is applauded for standing up for what is right but the wife who wants to sound the alarm is often silenced by the very community that should be offering her the most support? Unfortunately, the not-so-subtle message being communicated by some in the church to these hurting women is “Honor your husband by keeping silent, even at the expense of your own healing.”

Who is communicating this destructive message? It’s the elder who tells a wife she is overreacting. It’s the Sunday School teacher who whispers maybe she should first try heating things up in the bedroom. It’s the pastor who suggests the wife spend some more time praying for her husband to come around before meeting with a counselor. It’s anyone who even thinks, That is just how God wired men.

I’m not advocating a wife take to Facebook to share her pain or make a phone call to activate the prayer chain. There is no healing to be found there. But she should be free to get the help she needs in the light of this devastating revelation, and it’s time the church came alongside her with their full support.

Yes, she should be cautious who she shares with, and certainly it would be considerate of her to share her intentions with her husband to get outside help. But if a husband attempts to use his authority as the spiritual head of the household to discourage his wife from getting help, then someone needs to call that out for what it is: spiritual manipulation, misuse of authority and unloving, self-centered sin.

There is nothing that strikes at our own core more deeply than our spouse’s sexual sin. Marriage, by its very nature—the becoming of one flesh—means the husband’s struggle is now the wife’s struggle. So if a wife wants to talk to someone about his struggle (which is now her struggle), she should be encouraged to do so, regardless of her husband’s discomfort.

A husband might wonder why his wife would even want to share her painful story with anyone anyway. It is something most husbands have tried so hard to hide. They don’t like to acknowledge its ugly existence, much less have conversations about it. Here is what husbands need to realize:

  • Wives don’t like talking about it; we need to talk about it. When we get the thoughts out of our heads and express them and hear feedback, it helps us grieve. It is like a valve releasing some of the pressure that has built up.
  • Talking about it helps us feel less isolated and alone.
  • Talking about it helps us organize our thoughts and emotions that feel out of control. Any sense of control is calming in the midst of this storm.

I believe there are thousands of wives sitting in our church pews each Sunday, suffering alone in silence. What can churches do to release wives from being their husbands’ secret-keepers?

  • Become a congregation where people are real, where suffering in this world is understood to be inevitable and where the body is involved in helping broken people heal. This example will give courage to couples that are afraid to share their brokenness.
  • Give wives a safe and confidential place to share.
  • Hold husbands accountable to their positions as spiritual leaders Sunday through Saturday—do this from the pulpit, on the golf course, one on one and in small groups.
  • Don’t support a theology of secret-keeping.

Think about it this: Who do we partner with when we help hide sin? In 2 Thessalonians 2:7, the Bible says the secret power of lawlessness is already at work and will remain at work until the man of lawlessness is completely removed. Church, we partner with our very enemy when we encourage sin to remain hidden. To do so under the cloak of “respect for spiritual authority” is a joke. And the enemy is laughing while our marriages are dying.

Leaders of the church, free these wives. Encourage them to get the help they need. If that means exposing their husbands’ secret sin against their husbands’ will, then so be it. It is the most loving and respectful thing they can do on behalf of their marriage.

Written by Marsha Fisher

Marsha Fisher and her husband, Jeff, are the creators of Inside Out Ministries and Porn to Purity. They are using their marriage recovery story as a platform to shed light on the growing problem of pornography addiction within the church and the gospel-centered resources available for those who want to find freedom.

For the original article, visit pastors.com.

4 Ways to Respond to Your Husband’s Porn Addiction.


man on computer
(FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

Your husband‘s addiction to pornography has just been discovered. The aftermath of this betrayal leaves every precious memory grimy and tainted. You muse back on your wedding night. Was he thinking of someporn star as he touched you? When you were working to conceive a baby together by night, what had he been conceiving with his computer monitor by day?

Your dreams are shattered. You despise him for how his sexual addiction makes you see him, and you’re panicked by how it makes you see yourself.

You’re tempted to think, I knew he never had eyes only for me, but I never dreamed it could go this far. I feel so ugly now. And when he isn’t quick to repent, who can blame you when you icily sneer, “Just get lost with that cuddly computer of yours and have fun.”

Head spinning, heart breaking, you cry in desperate prayer: “Can I ever trust my husband again? My whole marriage is a mirage! Where are You, Lord?”

God is right beside you. Sure, it may appear that He has taken His hand off of your marriage, but your husband’s sin has been in God’s sights for some time—a sin that has been washing out your spiritual protection and threatening to flood your children’s lives with generational sin—in spite of how well your husband’s been hiding the evidence. But now God’s blown your husband’s cover, a sure sign of God’s active role in your marriage.

God wants you to take an active role, too, and the first step in rebuilding trust with your husband is to trust God enough to find His heart for your husband in this mess. God wants restoration.

God’s Heart for Men Who Struggle 

Recently, my husband, Fred, and I knelt in intercession as he prepared to challenge a large group of pastors to deeper sexual purity. Without warning, Fred suddenly broke into deep sobs. Moments later, he walked out and spoke with a grace and power I had never seen in him before.

Later, he recounted, “I wasn’t sure I had the right attitude, so I prayed, ‘Lord, I want Your heart as I speak to these men today. As many as half of these guys have been checking out the porn, and You know how that frustrates me to no end. But Lord, I don’t want to speak out of my feelings. Can You let me feel Your feelings toward them today?’

“Instantly, the Lord laid His emotions inside my chest. I burst into tears and felt as though my heart would explode. Then, about three minutes later, it stopped as quickly as it began. Quietly, the Lord whispered, ‘There. Now you know how I ache for My cherished pastors, in spite of their sin. Speak to them from that aching place in My heart.'”

God wants you to minister to your husband in that same grace and power, and He can give you His heart for your husband as easily as He gave Fred His heart for the pastors. God wants His heart reigning inside of you, enabling you to see beyond your husband’s sin and into the brokenness behind it all.

I speak from personal experience. Even when Fred’s temper and sexual sin were ripping up our home, I could see value in him beyond his sin. He had put me first in so many ways in our relationship, and it made me willing to want to go an extra mile for him.

I could also see the dysfunctional pain and confusion still trailing him from his broken childhood home. I saw that he had never had one completely faithful person in his entire life. I decided to become that first person.

There was another reason I chose restoration over divorce. God loves restoration for the same reason He hates divorce: the children. He knows how hard it is to raise godly children in the wake of divorce, and He knows that the message of salvation passes down to them most easily when the parents are one.

Speaking of husbands and wives through His prophet Malachi, God says: “Has not the Lord made them one? In flesh and spirit they’re His. And why one? Because He was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth. ‘I hate divorce,’ says the Lord God” (Mal. 2:15-16, NIV).

In light of all this, I knew I had no right to think of myself first in our marital troubles. I had to think of the kids before I thought of myself and, so, I had to see Fred and the marriage before myself, too. The same is true for you.

Granted, your marriage may now be in shambles, and what lies ahead might even be worse. But God’s call on your life still remains—to build a marriage that pictures Christ‘s relationship to the church.

Is Divorce Ever an Option?

Obviously, some men will never soften. When is the damage from his sexual sin irreparable? Is divorce ever an option?

Sure it is. Adultery always makes divorce an option, and if your husband will not repent and refuses to turn from an ongoing, regular porn habit, he is an adulterer.

But if you want a magical line between “reparable damage” and “irreparable damage” to trigger divorce proceedings for you, forget it. There is no line of irreparable damage in the distance somewhere; it lurks right at your door from the moment he refuses to repent. There is nowhere to hide.

Staying married surely isn’t safe. His sexual sin poses huge spiritual danger to the whole family, and compromises his spiritual protection over you. I was chased regularly in nightmares by Satan until Fred turned from his sexual sin. I haven’t had such a nightmare since.

There is also the generational sin we spoke of, as well as the ongoing danger that your sons and daughters will stumble upon his magazines, tapes and websites—the most common way young men fall into sexual bondage. Worst of all, your husband will not be the example your son needs to teach him that his Christian walk includes sexual purity. Cascading stages of irreparable damage begin to flow from the moment your husband refuses repentance.

Then why not divorce? Because divorce brings destructive cascades of its own. Statistics show that young men often turn to pornography in the wake of divorce to salve their emotional pain and to begin to explore their masculinity.

Furthermore, sexual addiction counselors find that divorce is no effective answer. Patrick Middleton, one such counselor in the Phoenix area, told me that he has seen very little evidence that divorce leads to consistently healthy results in families shattered by porn.

So whether you stay or go, his sexual sin will wreak its havoc and there are no easy options. But if you do choose to stay, it is time to take an active role in the battle, doing all you can to release the law of reaping and sowing into your husband’s life.

Perhaps your husband has paid little price for his sin in the past. Those days must end, so that he might come to his senses in the midst of the mess he has made.

A Helpmate Is an Active Role 

As wives, God has given us two roles to play in marriage. One role relates to submission, and the other involves our responsibility to be our husband’s helpmate. The trouble is that we too often play the wrong role in the face of sexual sin, submitting quietly in the messy tide of events, alternating between wringing our hands in worry and folding our hands to pray while we wait for our husbands to turn.

This is time to play the other role. You were created to help your husband from the beginning: “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him” (Gen. 2:18).

The word helper comes from a Hebrew word in Genesis, which means “a help as his counterpart.” So what does a helper do? Fred likes to explain it this way: As a helper, a wife’s role is to help lift her husband—boost him, prod him, encourage him—to Christian greatness, or maturity in Christ.

What is the most effective way to help your husband? First, take steps toward your own healing. Then, confront your husband, telling him what a Christian wife expects of a mature, Christian husband in marriage and holding him accountable to become that very man. Then put these four key actions in motion:

1. Learn about the differences. When a sexually addicted husband is unrepentant, a wife begins to heal by learning the sexual differences between men and women. The real root of his sexual sin lies elsewhere. Once you understand that his problem is not about you, your beauty or sexiness, you can quickly recover your sense of worth and focus on restoration.

2. Develop spiritual disciplines. Prayer and Bible reading will allow the Lord to speak to your heart and keep a steady walk with Him. If you are to heal, you need a stronger prayer life than ever before.

You also need to develop a few close female relationships for support, insights and sharing your pain. Avoid male relationships like the plague…hold yourself emotionally separate from any other men and avoid discussing your dreams and desires with other men. Secular TV, movies and books can feed the discontent that you have in your life, so avoid them.

Also, do not overcommit your time. You have already been called to an important ministry in God—restoring your husband and marriage. Give it the time and energy that any great call deserves.

You do not need to add other ministries or time stresses to your life. Keep things pared down enough so that no matter what you are doing (raising kids, working at an outside job, volunteering) you still have the time and focus for the restoration process at home.

3. Reject hypervigilance. Perhaps a fear-motivated question is plaguing you: But what if he does it again? Reject fear. You naturally desire the safety that control can bring, but a hyper-vigilant focus upon his every move cannot deliver the safety you crave.

What you really need if you are to feel safe is a sense of your own self, your value in God, and the development of your own skills to communicate your pain and to set and enforce boundaries. Settle for nothing less than God’s picture of marriage.

Source: CHARISMA NEWS.

BRENDA STOEKER

National Prayer Day Against Pornography Calls Intercessors to Action.


prayer
On Dec. 10, thousands of supporters will join together for a National Day of Prayer to strengthen the fight against pornography. (Stacey Lewis/creationswap.com)

On Dec. 10, thousands of supporters will join together in a National Day of Prayer to strengthen the fight against pornography. Some of the groups allied with Morality in Media participating in this effort include Alliance Defending Freedom, American Family Association, Family Research Council, Concerned Women for America, Movieguide and many more.

“The war on pornography can only be won with the blessing of almighty God, and we humbly join together to seek that blessing,” says Patrick Trueman, president of Morality in Media. “This day is set aside to help those who are struggling with pornography addictions as well as their families, and to inspire and encourage those involved in this fight.”

Pornography is inherently dehumanizing, sexually exploitative and an affront to God. Not only does it lead to addiction and the breakdown of families, but porn is also strongly tied to violence against women, sex trafficking and child abuse.

Suggested prayer requests can be found at pornharms.com/prayer. People of all religious backgrounds are encouraged to participate.

Source: CHARISMA NEWS.

ABBY CARR

How Accountability Can Help You Live with Freedom and Confidence.


Whitney Hopler

Editor’s Note: The following is a report on the practical applications of Craig Gross‘ book, Open: What Happens When You Get Real, Get Honest, and Get Accountable (Thomas Nelson, 2013).

Everyone struggles with sin in this fallen world – from gossiping about others or spending money irresponsibly to addictive behavior with pornography or alcohol. No matter what type of sins you struggle with, however, you don’t have to let those sins control your life.

Our society is full of people who try to cover up their sins and spend valuable time and energy worrying about what will happen when the truth about their behavior eventually comes to light. That’s an exhausting and destructive way to live. God offers a much better way to deal with sin: accountability.

When you live an open life before God and a few other Christians whom you trust, you can enjoy freedom from sin’s power over you and the confidence that you’re growing more powerful over sin. Here’s how you can pursue accountability:

Approach accountability from an accurate perspective. Accountability shouldn’t be harsh, with people admonishing you to follow rules and judging you when you fall short of their expectations. Instead, accountability involves deep relationships with people who care about you and will encourage and challenge you in ways that lead you to God’s best for your life. Also, accountability shouldn’t involve broadcasting your private information to the whole world. Instead, accountability involves simply opening up with a few people you know, love, and trust who want the best for you and will treat the information you share with respect and grace.

Understand why accountability is necessary and important. Keep in mind that participating in an accountability group gives you valuable opportunities to explore your personal issues and grow as a person in a safe and supportive atmosphere. It also gives you the benefit of deep relationships with others, which will motivate you to make good choices when facing temptations to sin.

Find a few good accountability partners. Pray for the wisdom to know who you should choose to assemble for a team of accountability partners in which you’ll participate. Choose a few people of your same gender whom you know well and can trust. Make sure that these people won’t just be “yes” men and women who will only tell you what you want to hear; instead, include people who have the courage to confront you about sin and the insight to present you with fresh perspectives on the issues you’re dealing with in life. Close friends are likely to work best as accountability partners, but some family members (such as your spouse or a sibling) could possibly work, as well.

Plan how to meet together. Schedule an accountability group meeting every week for at least a half hour at a specific place (or via conference call, if you can’t all meet in person) to discuss what’s really going on in each of your lives and help hold each other accountable to deal with sin and keep growing closer to God. Set a format for each meeting that includes just a small amount of time for chatting and focuses mostly on asking each other questions about your lives, listening, discussing, and praying. In between meetings, nurture your friendships with each other in less formal ways, such as by eating meals together or joining each other for fun outings.

Ask each other helpful questions. Some questions you may choose to ask each other during weekly meetings include: “How was your week?” “Did the things you said and did this week make your life better? Did they represent you well to the rest of the world?” “How have you treated those who are important to you this week? Did you honor them and treat them with grace and generosity?” “Did you use any of your words as weapons this week, either to someone’s face or behind their backs?” “What about anger? Are you angry or resentful toward someone? Are you holding on to that anger or letting it go?” What about your stuff? Have you been trustworthy with your money and belongings this week?” “Have you indulged in lusts or anything of a sexual nature, whether physically or mentally?” “Have you caved into any of your addictions or weaknesses this week?” “Were you honest and truthful in all you did?” “Did you take at least one full day off from work this week?” “Have you encountered any new triggers to sin, and if so, how you can you avoid them next time?” “What lies have you told  someone in the past week?” “What secret are you keeping from someone else or the group?” “How are you feeling emotionally right now?”,and “Did you lie to me in your answers to any of these questions?”

Be completely honest with each other. Partial honesty isn’t enough; only 100 percent honesty will do. Keep in mind that, if you can’t be completely honest with your accountability partners, then who can you be honest with? Also, if you aren’t being honest with your accountability group, are you really being honest with yourself?

Listen carefully to each other. When others in your group are sharing their thoughts and feelings, give them your full attention, listening carefully to them. Afterward, don’t judge or criticize them, but instead challenge them – with love and respect – to put their faith into action to deal with the issues they’ve shared. Let them know that they can count on your support as they try to grow in those areas.

Keep information confidential. Protect the privacy of the people in your group who share sensitive information with you by keeping it absolutely confidential. Ask God to help you make sure that you keep your promises not to reveal private information to people outside your accountability group. Remember that even one breach of confidentiality can break the crucial bonds of trust between you that are necessary for your accountability group to function.

Courageously consider the reasons why you’re struggling with various issues. Ask God to give you the courage to investigate why you’re driven to act in certain ways that trouble you, and to figure out how to pursue healing and make better choices moving forward.

Motivate and help each other achieve goals. Encourage and support each other to set and take specific steps to reach specific goals – from losing a certain amount of weight to overcoming an addiction to pornography. Use the strengths and weaknesses of everyone in your group to complement each other as you spur each other on to live better lives. Learn from mistakes and celebrate successes together.

Adapted from Open: What Happens When You Get Real, Get Honest, and Get Accountable, copyright 2013 by Craig William Gross. Published by Thomas Nelson, Nashville, Tn.,www.thomasnelson.com.

Craig Gross is an author, speaker, pastor, and revolutionary. He shot to prominence in 2002 when he founded the website www.XXXchurch.com. Craig is the author of nine books. He currently resides in Los Angeles, Ca., with his wife, Jeanette, and their two children, Nolan and Elise.

Whitney Hopler, who has served as a Crosswalk.com contributing writer for many years, is author of the new Christian novel Dream Factory, which is set during Hollywood’s golden age. Visit her website at: whitneyhopler.naiwe.com.

Publication date: September 30, 2013

British Parliamentary Porn-Watching Figures Laid Bare.


Members of the British Parliament and parliamentary staff have apparently been trying to access porn websites potentially thousands of times since May 2012, according to official figures obtained by the Huffington Post UK.
Following a Freedom of Information (FOI) request from the Huffington Post, House of Commons authorities acknowledged that users of the Parliamentary Network servers, including both parliamentary members  and their staff, have repeatedly attempted to access websites classified on parliament’s network as pornographic between May 2012 and July 2013.
According to the official figures, the number of attempts to access such websites via the Parliamentary Network peaked for 2012 at 114,844 last November and at 55,552 in April for 2013.
The figures have varied wildly, with the peak in attempted access this April more than halving in the following month to just 18,436 this May.
Parliamentary officials indicated that the figures would be inflated by websites automatically refreshing and thus adding to recorded access attempts. Additionally, pop-up or embeddable content like videos and pictures could inflate the numbers.
A House of Commons spokeswoman said the statistics do not prove a user “intended” to access a pornographic website because “a user may access a site that contains optional or automatic links to others, or other ‘pop-up’ arrangements, which are recorded as requests.”
However, the spokeswoman declined to respond to the question that such content which would likely be deemed “pornographic” on parliamentary servers would not be found while surfing ordinary mainstream websites. The spokeswoman was unable to answer why the figure could vary drastically from month to month.
Parliamentary officials refused to reveal exactly what their servers judge as “pornographic” for “security” reasons when asked by the Huffington Post UK.

© 2013 Newsmax. All rights reserved.

By Joel Himelfarb

How ‘World’s Hottest Porn Star’ Found God.


 

Brittni Ruiz, Jenna Presley
Ex-porn star Jenna Presley, whose real name is Brittni Ruiz, talks about her journey in a video from XXXChurch. (YouTube)

Jenna Presley was known as the world’s hottest porn star, with starring roles in more than 275 movies. Now, a year after accepting Christ, she is using her real name—Brittni Ruiz—and talking about her journey.

Ruiz, now 26, was in the adult film industry for seven years. At the height of her success, she filmed up to three sex scenes per day. She eventually turned to drugs and alcohol to cope with her tumultuous life and career, and even attempted suicide several times.

In a video from XXXChurch, Ruiz sits down with church member Rachel Collins—whom Ruiz had met at pornography conventions—and explains how she began her career at 18, how she started to spiral downward, and what led to her transformation in Christ.

Can Christians Blame Their Porn Addictions on Apple?.


Steve Jobs with a Macbook Pro
Neither the devil nor Apple can make us do anything. So who’s to blame for Christian porn addictions?

In a headline that may remind Christians of the old “devil made me do it” excuse for sinning, an admitted porn addict is suing Apple for opening the door to his naughty habits and destroying his marriage.

Chris Sevier, 36, filed a 50-page complaint with the Tennessee Supreme Court blaming Apple for neglecting to install a porn filter on new devices. The way he reasons it, if Apple had taken steps to make sure customers can’t watch porn on its iconic computer, he wouldn’t be in bondage to sexual immorality.

Sevier also points the finger at Apple for horrible acts like sex trafficking and even the proliferation of Viagra commercials on late night TV. What does Sevier want? Money, of course.

Paul warned that in the last days, men would be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, unholy, unforgiving, without self-control and lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God (2 Tim. 3:1-4). We’re seeing this prophetic word come to pass even in this hour.

Unfortunately, Sevier is not the only one shifting the blame—or at least turning a blind eye to the dark forces that are truly propagating pornography in this hour. Many Christians, too, are blind to the spirit of immorality’s impact on their lives.

A ChristiaNet poll reveals that 50 percent of all Christian men and 20 percent of all Christian women are addicted addicted to pornography. Yes, addicted. Not just one-time viewers or even frequent users. Addicted. What is more, 60 percent of the women who answered the survey admitted to having significant struggles with lust, and 40 percent admitted to being involved in sexual sin in the past year.

In a recent Pastors.com survey, 54 percent of pastors surveyed said they had viewed porn within the past year. Consider this: Even as the church fights against the sex-trade industry, part of the church is unwittingly supporting it through pornography. The depths of this wickedness, then, are sadly ironic, much like Sevier’s case against Apple.

Thank God for ministries that help Christians and others addicted to porn. We’ve seen inspiring testimonies from pastors and others who have broken these chains of bondage. But the first step is admitting the problem. If you are addicted to pornography, reach out to one of the many Christian ministries online for help, like XXX Church.

Source: CHARISMA NEWS.

JENNIFER LECLAIRE

Jennifer LeClaire is news editor at Charisma. She is also the author of several books, including The Spiritual Warrior’s Guide to Defeating Jezebel. You can email Jennifer at  jennifer.leclaire@charismamedia.com or visit her website hereYou can also join Jennifer on Facebook or follow her on Twitter.

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